The Secret of Self Growth

In our culture it seems that if you are not constantly trying to improve yourself, you are doing something bad. I have a problem with this viewpoint because the “self improvement is all there is” attitude leaves no room for compromise. Continue reading my post to hear the rest of my input.

There seems to be an ever-growing feeling, in our culture, that “self-help,” self improvement, and self growth are not only important, but the be-all and end-all of life. In other words, if you’re not constantly trying to improve yourself, you’re doing Something Bad.

I don’t completely disagree with this. I do find it hard to understand anyone not wanting to grow and improve their life. I have known people who never seem to want to be better than they are (and how they are is nothing to brag about), and I just can’t understand that. I always want to strive to be more than I am.

But the problem I have with this “self improvement is all there is” viewpoint is that there’s no compromise. In other words, it’s not okay to be who you are.


It’s all about being more and being someone you’re going to be in the future.

The problem is, once you get to “the future,” you’re still not the person you’re going to be “in the future.” You’re still not “perfect.”

And therein lies the rub.

Because you are never going to be the person you’re going to be in the future.

I think we need to compromise a little bit. I’m not saying we should just accept who we are and not try to be more and better. That’s not compromise, that’s a cop-out.

What I am saying is that we should accept ourselves as we are, when who we are and what we are is a product of hard work and attempting to become who we want to be. If we’re doing our best, we should be able to enjoy the fruits of our labor and take pride in who we are.

And to be absolutely honest with you, I think anything less is not in the spirit of self growth and self improvement. After all, one of the things you’re doing, if you are really practicing self growth, is learning to forgive and allow others to be themselves.

But not yourself? What kind of sense does that make? Everyone else is human, but you have to be perfect?

Well, now that I put it like that, maybe it doesn’t make so much sense, after all.

As I said, I’m not suggesting “This is who I am and I can’t help it.” I’m suggesting, “I am proud of the work I’ve done to become who I am, and I am enjoying becoming more of who I am.”

And that’s all I’m suggesting. Not a cop-out, just acceptance. After all, that’s what you’re trying to do anyway, so just extend it to yourself.

To start accepting yourself today:

• Notice when you say things about what you will be or do in the future.
• Try to stop yourself and consciously think, “but I’m fine right now.”
• Know that fine right now does not mean fine like this forever, and keep moving.

Thanks to Life as a Hero for featuring this post.

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