Relinquishee, Adoptee, MPE
Author, Speaker.

Create Your Own Paradigm Shifts By Dumping the Negative

Here are a couple lessons to help you get out of the mindset of always having to be in control.

How do you change the way you think? It’s easy – stop thinking negatively! Ok, so maybe it isn’t easy as all that, but for many of us we have way too many ways of thinking that always involve something negative. We just know that if we do something outside the box, we are going to fail miserably at it. You see what you are doing don’t you? You are using a negative paradigm to set yourself up for failure before you even attempted to do anything!

The world is such a big place – and so many people with different values, ways of thinking and ways of living inhabit it.

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Yet as big of a world as we live in, far too many people are closed minded in the way they think. They simply refuse to let go of the thoughts that it’s “their way or the highway”. These types of people are nowhere near living life to its fullest because they are stuck in a cycle of thinking that they just have to be in control of everything – that if they don’t voice their thoughts on an issue, or tell someone how to do it directly, that the task will surely fail.

Lesson #1 – Lose the “if it’s meant to be, it’s up to me” mindset! The world will not stop revolving if you aren’t personally involved. In fact, I personally pledge to you that it will not. Sometimes it is perfectly acceptable to be a participant of an event in life and not the person who is doing it! We miss so much of our lives (and the lives of our family – you remember, those people who live in the same house as you do) because we think we always have to be doing something. We don’t care what it is, just as long as we are involved in doing it ourselves. It’s time to just sit back, relax and be a human being – it is perfectly acceptable now and then to let someone else carry the torch for awhile! Don’t be afraid to say no!

We live in a chaotic world and it is full of mystery, surprise and adventure. Enjoy your own adventure, but let others have their adventure as well. Don’t try to control a chaotic world by forcing your beliefs or values on others – it simply will not work. Instead, learn more about the cultures, values and beliefs of different people around the world. It will make you a better-rounded person and open your eyes and mind to all the different aspects of the world we live in.

Lesson #2 – Forget about the invisible ticking clock in your life! You don’t have to find all the answers before your time is up – leave some for the next generation to find. Stop rushing around trying to get everything done and start spending more time with your friends and family. Doesn’t it seem like as each year goes by the world goes by faster and faster? People work longer hours and spend less time doing the things that they enjoy. Truly successful people know when to just sit back and do nothing but enjoy life – learn that trait as well and you will find that life suddenly isn’t as hectic and that all the things you once enjoyed are still out there waiting for you to rediscover them.

We must all learn how to break out of our negative thought cycle and create our own paradigm shift in life. Life is way too short to expel all of our energy on things that, in the end, just aren’t that important that we get done right away. Learn to create an entirely new thought pattern in your life by slowing down and taking in the grand view of everything around you. You might find that you give new meaning to your own life and help those around you discover a whole new you!

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